Manufacture Your Day by LETTING GO OF ANGER
Have you ever observed how many people seem to have anger issues? They are angry with themselves, with others and with life in general.
Last week I received a question from one of my readers and I would like to address it today.
Here it goes: “Karin, I like the advice and tools you give to work through problems in the workforce. What I would like to see is a blog on, ‘once you are in a pickle and tied in a knot from your bad mood (despite having all the tools to change it around) how can you get out of a bad/angry place in a shorter time frame?”, turning a bad mood/day in less than 24hrs (which is my stewing time), say 2 hours.”
We can all be angry and it is important to let go of anger as fast as humanly possible. 24 hours isn’t even that bad considering that some people hold on to anger for weeks, months and sometimes for years.
I have many of my insights from studying Tony Robbins’ teachings over years. It had a huge impact on me and my life when I discovered that it truly matters where we live emotionally. In what state of emotion do we spend most of our time?
Don’t you think we should all set the intention to live as joyful and happy as we possibly can?
While this is easy when things are good, it is much more difficult when something is really bothering us. Having said this, we can master anything it we put our mind to it.
To answer my reader’s question – if you would like to bounce back faster, it is a matter of practice. Nothing worth achieving comes without putting in the work. It doesn’t happen overnight but you will see progress very soon.
Remember, when emotions are high, intelligence is low. Our emotional mind is our default operation system.
As a mental strategy for letting go of anger I highly recommend the traffic light system.
Think (thinking helps us to tap into our intelligent mind and interrupts the reaction pattern) and take a deep breath; think about possible consequences if you don’t control yourself – for your internal world and for your external world.
Discover what’s going on inside of you. Where is this feeling coming from? Ask yourself, “Do I want to feel this way? How do I want to feel?”
Choose how you want to feel! For example, joyful. What can put you into a joyful state? (shift focus by watching a funny video, smile/faking a smile for 1 minutes works wonders; interact with little children, play with a pet, exercise, meditate, put on some music you like and dance – in short give your attention to something else that you enjoy doing);
Holding on to negative emotions has negative consequences – especially for your health and well being.
- Set a goal – For example, never go to bed feeling angry (this would shorten the 24 hour timeframe immediately)
- Think different thoughts – How you feel is a result of your thoughts. If you want to change the feeling, change your thoughts.
- Remind yourself that you can be in control – how fast you bounce back is a matter of choice, practice and determination.
You are one of a kind. Get down to it. It will be worth it.
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