Manufacture Your Day by KNOWING HOW TO MANAGE ANGER
Easier said than done but for the benefit of yourself and others, it can be a real asset if you learn how to deal with anger.
People can get bent out of shape pretty easily these days. The pressure is high, people have to do more with less, and working a crazy amount of hours has almost become a status symbol.
There are two sides to every story.
1) “Take” Anger:
An angry person can confront you and you have to respond. Sometimes this person may be your boss.
- Acknowledge the emotion (this is a must because it makes the person feel understood): I am sorry to see you so angry. I am sorry you feel this way. I apologize for causing you so much frustration.
- Follow-up with a question: Can I ask what exactly happened? How can we work together to solve this problem as fast as we can?
- Don’t try to be right (even if you are) with an emotional person – you cannot win: When emotions are high, intelligence is low. This strategy is just meant to defuse the emotions.
- Be courageous and follow up: Within 24 hours speak to the person and say, “I don’t appreciate how you spoke to me this morning/afternoon. I felt bullied and belittled and because of it, I wasn’t productive all day. How does rage/anger help to solve the situation?”
- If you made a mistake, own it (don’t make excuses) and learn from it.
- Always hold your own: Bullies tend to attack people who cannot stand up for themselves.
2) “Give” Anger:
If you just say what’s on your mind without considering any harm this reactive mode may cause.
- Awareness: Keep track what situations and people make you angry and where you feel the anger in your body (chest, stomach, throat).
- Pause: Find a way to stop yourself from reacting. Take a deep breath and think about possible consequences before you speak.
- Shift focus and choose your response: How much will this matter a few days from now? What is good about the person / situation. If you shift your focus to the positive, you will start to feel better. If you feel better, you will be able to resolve the situation faster.
- Don’t hold a grudge: Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”- Buddha
Emotional intelligence isn’t a new concept but speaking about emotions in manufacturing companies is still out of the ordinary in this male dominated industry. Having said this, “emotional labor” is real and if people aren’t in a good emotional state, their productivity and how they speak to others will suffer.
I still hear comments such as:
- People should leave their emotions at home.
- I don’t understand why emotions get in the way of the decision making process.
- This person is too emotional for me.
- There is no room for emotions in business.
Yeah right. Only people who are completely out of touch with their own emotional state would say that.
Just read this article “Like It Or Not, No One Is Leaving Their Emotions At Home”.
In my work I have started to implement basic business psychology, mindfulness awareness, stress management techniques, mental strength strategies, constructive thought process methods and emotional control tools.
People are hungry for change and psychological tools have become a game changer to be better equipped for their daily challenges.
Are you one of them?